..and I found it funny... maybe it was my extreme boredom or amazing ability to be easily amused, but I giggled... so here it is friends, with my own commentary and whatnot, as usual :)
The Eight People Who Will Ruin Your Party
8. Person Who Insists on Cleaning Up Your Party While It's Still Going On
Where You Can Find Them: All up in your ish, asking you if you're done with the drink you're still holding, or carrying a white trash bag stalking your apartment for trash.
Why They Ruin Your Party: It's nice that they're so eager to help you clean up, but its pretty much assumed and understood that if you're going to throw a party at your place, it's going to end up looking like Amy Winehouse's bedroom... and odds are, your friend's will get easily annoyed with the clean freak.
7. Guy Who Gets Wasted In The First Hour
Where You Can Find Them: Wherever the booze is located.
Why They Ruin Your Party: This guy shows up early, and waaaay too excited to get wasted. He then proceeds to shotgun, chug, and bodyshot everything and anything he can get his hands on... In 45 minutes. So instead of being able to kick back and chill with your friends, or talk to that hottie you have your eye on, you have to make sure your passed out friend doesn't get bodily fluids on himself.. let alone your stuff. eww.
6. Person Who Only Knows You
Where You Can Find Them: Right freaking next to you the entire time.
Why They Ruin Your Party: You invited them because you thought they were cool and would bring hot friends. But now that they showed up solo, and clinging to you awkwardly, you wish you hadn't... forcing you to a) drag them around with you the entire time, making them a part of all your conversations, or b) leaving them alone in the corner as they stare at you awkwardly... and having friend after friend tell you "watch your back.. there's a creeper over there staring you down..."
5. Girl (Or Guy) Who Starts Crying
Where You Can Find Them: Hogging the bathroom, or in someone's bedroom.
Why They Ruin Your Party: For some odd reason, they decided to show up at your party, KNOWING they just broke up with someone... and now that they've got crunk juice in them, decided to make you their personal oprah. And no matter what you say, or how many hugs they give, they still cry... and refuse to get their sobbing butt out of the bathroom everyone so desperately needs.
4. The Dude Who Just Got Dumped
Where You Can Find Them: Trapping some unsuspecting person in a corner, talking way too much.
Why They Ruin Your Party: Don't be confused friends... this person is actually different than the crier above. Rather than leaning on the shoulders of friends, this guy is known to approach a complete stranger and immediately start talking about his failed relationship. And as much as you want to get away from this guy you can't... because you made the mistake of listening to him for 2 minutes, he now considers you his temporary BFF.
3. The Creepy Dude Who Tries To Get With All Your Friends
Where You Can Find Them: Next to anything with a vajayjay.
Why They Ruin Your Party: For one, he's just plain creepy, and refuses to get the hint that none of your friends want him. Also, if he actually goes home with one of your friends, your party will not be known as "That Awesome Halloween Party" but instead, "That Party Where Becky Became The Inspiration for a Lifetime Movie".
2. Couple Who Brings Their Baby
Where You Can Find Them: Everywhere, annoying everyone with the screaming, pooping mess, that is their child.
Why They Ruin Your Party: You obviously named you party KEGFEST '08 for a reason... and there's a BABY AT THE PARTY.... need i say more?
1. The Politics Guy
Where You Can Find Them: Wandering from group to group, annoying the hell out of everyone.
Why They Ruin Your Party: For some reason they deem it appropriate to discuss the credentials of Sarah Palin with you, when all you care about is finding more booze, and getting your groove on with that hottie you saw earlier.
